Finding a Good Therapist and Jesus: A Path to Healing

I grew up in the hood of NYC, where survival often took priority over healing. We didn’t talk about emotions—we toughened up, brushed it off, and kept it moving. But deep down, I knew I was carrying wounds that needed more than just time to heal. After separating from my son's father, I hit rock bottom and realized that I couldn’t keep running from myself. That was when my journey of healing truly began—through therapy and, most importantly, through Jesus Christ.

Kerry Washington once said in an interview that therapy is a lifestyle choice, and I couldn’t agree more. But let’s be real—where I come from, therapy wasn’t even in the conversation. In my Latin household, talking to a stranger about your problems was seen as weakness. We handled things “in-house.” But what happens when the house is broken? When the very people who raised you never learned how to navigate their own trauma? That’s when I realized I needed to break the cycle. The Bible says in Romans 12:2, "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." Therapy, combined with faith, was my path to renewal.

Dr. Anita Phillips, in her book The Garden Within, speaks about how trauma takes root deep within us, shaping our emotions and behaviors in ways we often don’t even realize. She writes, "Your heart is a garden, and every experience—good or bad—is a seed planted within it." If we do not tend to that garden, the weeds of trauma and pain will choke out the beauty God intended for us. That resonated with me deeply. I had to confront the roots of my wounds, not just the surface symptoms. Therapy and faith gave me the tools to start pulling out the weeds so new life could grow.

For me, finding a Christian counselor was a game-changer. Here on this blog, we bring God into the center of all things, and that includes healing. My counselor prays with me and for me, helping me see my struggles through the lens of God’s word. Healing isn’t just a mental or emotional process—it’s a spiritual one too. Psalm 34:18 reminds us, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." That verse carried me through some of my darkest days.

In my previous blog post, "When Grief Became My Survival Mode," I shared how I unknowingly slipped into survival mode, masking my pain with busyness and distractions. I realized that my decisions were driven by unresolved grief, leading me in circles of confusion and frustration. This acknowledgment was a pivotal moment in my healing journey, highlighting the importance of confronting pain rather than avoiding it.

For a long time, I was caught in a cycle of failed relationships, wondering why I kept facing the same heartbreak. At first, I pointed fingers. But eventually, I had to face a hard truth: the common denominator was me. That wasn’t about blaming myself, but about taking accountability. God was calling me to self-reflection. In Matthew 7:5, Jesus says, "First take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye." I had to look in the mirror and acknowledge the areas where I needed growth.

Healing is a journey, not a destination. Some days are easy; others feel impossible. But through it all, I know that God is with me. If you’re hesitant about therapy, I encourage you to pray about it. Ask God to guide you to the right person, to place people in your life who will help you grow. And remember, you are not alone.

Trauma isn’t easy, but choosing to stay a victim isn’t easy either. I am still learning to this day. Healing is messy, but it is worth it. Dr. Anita Phillips also says, "Healing is not about forgetting your pain, but about transforming it into wisdom and strength." I choose transformation. I choose to tend to my heart’s garden and allow God to make beauty from the ashes.

You deserve to heal. You deserve peace. You deserve to walk in the fullness of who God created you to be. And that begins with surrendering to Him and taking the steps toward healing—whether through therapy, through faith, or both.

And this is only the beginning. In my next post, I’ll be diving deeper into what it means to truly surrender to God in the healing process and how to embrace the freedom He has already promised us. Stay tuned—your healing journey is just getting started.

"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." —Psalm 147:3